“I Need Ammunition, Not A Ride.”

There’s something very different about the Russia-Ukraine war. In other wars started by Russia, most other countries condemned Putin, or just sighed in resignation went on with their lives.

“If we remain silent today, we will be gone tomorrow.”

87 nations didn’t rise up against Putin’s support of Bashar al-Assad when all those Syrians got killed. 87 nations didn’t shame China for it’s attempt at genocide of Uighurs.

Light will shine over darkness.”

This time the US, Europe and others erupted in outrage, decrying Putin’s bullying and sending C-17’s filled with billions of dollars in military and humanitarian aid to Ukraine.  

Makes you wonder: what makes Ukraine so special?

The story has taken over the media. Every day we read heart rending stories of refugees – women and children, mostly – leaving Ukraine. Everyday we read inspiring stories of others who stayed to fight the Russians. Everyday we read about people from other countries crossing into Ukraine to join the fight.

“It’s a victory when the weapons fall silent and people speak up.”

It’s been deja vu after deja vu of WWII: mothers and babies with blood on their faces, buildings with only one wall standing, black smoke fires where hospitals used to be. 

“We will not forget. We will punish everyone who committed atrocities in this war…You will not have a quiet place on this earth, except for a grave.”

Putin couldn’t win with quick, surgical strikes, so he reverted to the time-honored Russian tactic of total destruction, decimating everything, from buildings to morale.

“We have tasted freedom and we will not give it up.”

But we’ve seen these scenes before, plenty of them, from WWII, Korea, Syria, Iraq, China, Bosnia, Yugoslavia, Crimea…

… Everywhere but LA…Oops! Then Chris Rock insulted Will Smith’s wife and got smacked for it by Will. 

So much for peace and love at the Oscars. 

Which probably ticked off Senators Graham, Hawley, and Cruz who would have liked to physically smack Supreme Court candidate Ketanji Brown Jackson, but chickened out and used their words instead. 

Sorry, too much TV.

So what’s different about this war?

“When you attack us you will see our faces. Not our backs but our faces.”

Is it the fact that the scenes are so reminiscent of the Nazi’s attacks on Poland, France? Is it the fact that Ukrainians are white and blond and straight out of Central Casting? Is it the fact that Ukraine is so close to Europe?  

The answer is yes…and no.

Yes, the WWII images still echo in our memories. Yes, Ukrainians are from Central Casting. Yes, if Russia can do this to Ukraine, Europe should worry.

But no, those scenes aren’t why 87 countries are uniting against Russia. They’re uniting against Russia because of rare, inspired and inspiring, leadership. 

“Nobody is going to break us; we’re strong, we’re Ukrainians.”

Volodymyr Zelenskyy is that leader. He is the Hollywood hero that has been missing for so long. He is Winston Churchill, Franklin Roosevelt, and Jack Kennedy.

His off-the-cuff comments are better than the best lines of John Wayne, Sean Connery, Daniel Craig or any other Hollywood hero. He’s real, a throwback to when national leaders led with their character. He connects with Ukrainians and everyone else because he doesn’t speak politics; he speaks his heart.

“I’m not in hiding. And I’m not afraid of anyone.”

Would people be so outraged at Putin without him? They weren’t when Russia took Georgia in 2008. They weren’t when Russia took Crimea in 2014. They weren’t when Russia attacked Donestk  and Lugansk in 2014. Things didn’t change until 2019, when Zelenskyy became President.

“I’m not iconic. Ukraine is iconic.”

Sorry, Mr. President. As the quotes here illustrate, you are iconic too.  

“This might be the last time you see me alive.”

I really hope not.

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Truth, Justice, and The Ukrainian Way

I feel sorry for  Russia…almost. Putin believed his own BS to the point of attacking a country the size of Texas with hearts the size of Texas’ self-image. As anyone from Texas will tell you, that doesn’t bode well for Putin.

Who’d a thunk Russia’s military would be so under-trained, under-supplied, and under-inspired? Who’d a thunk, just a few weeks into a war, Putin would have fired 8 generals and have four more killed in action?  

His only hope is not running out of missiles and artillery shells before Uncle Xi can help. 

One of the more intriguing parts of this story is how many military experts sided with Putin in predicting a quick victory for Russia.

Another is the world’s reaction. 87 countries  have come out against Russia. And most are not just verbalizing; they’re supplying Ukraine with everything from weapons to SUV’s to medical supplies to food. 

400 companies have shut down the Russian operations. Putin’s response? He’ll nationalize them. I wonder what movies he’ll stream on PutinFlix, or what food he’ll serve at McPutins, or what economic losses he’ll tabulate in Putexcel.

In a way, we may owe Putin a thank you. He’s brought much of a painfully riven country back together. Democrats and Republicans (well, except the Tucker-Trump fans) are speaking out against Putin.

Americans are donating millions of dollars to Ukraine. Our veterans are volunteering for the Ukraine military. Others are opening their homes to Ukrainian refugees. 

Congress actually took time off from trying to pass H.R. 2116 – the CROWN Act, a bill banning race-based hair discrimination, to pass legislation sending money and weapons to Ukraine. 

More shocking, they all sat together. Yes! Without spitting on each other –  last Wednesday – to listen to a real leader speak about real patriotism, real sacrifice.

Volodymyr Zelenskyy, for whom English is a third language, used simple words to talk about truth, justice and what was once the American Way.  

Move over Superman, your real life persona has arrived.

Which reminds me of another country’s response to an earlier Russian dictator. “There are so many Russians and our country is so small, where will we find room to bury them all?” said the Finnish people when Stalin attacked them in 1939.

Now there’s inspiration.

(If you like this, pass it on. If you don't, pass it on anyway. Why should you suffer alone?)

The Woman On The Couch

She’s a young woman in her twenties: smart, energetic, empathetic, self-sufficient, a quick learner.

She’s a full-time medical assistant and part-time babysitter working for lousy pay to support herself and save for medical school. 

She sits on the couch, crying.

Not because of the twelve hour days. Not because of the stress of preparing for the MCAT. Not because of the long drives to the small home in Northeast Philly to visit her little siblings.

Nope. She is crying because her countrymen are being blown-up, shot up, cut-up, and slaughtered by Vladimir Putin.

This young woman and her family immigrated to the US from Ukraine when she was nine and her older brother was eleven— six years before her sister was born, seven years before her twin brothers were born. She was raised in rural Ukraine by her grandfather (who died just a few months ago) and her grandmother. Her parents had to find work in separate nations to feed the family. 

Sixteen years later she is well-educated, hard-working, thoughtful, kind, and ambitious. She doesn’t have a shred of an accent. 

What she does have is a visceral and ethereal bond with her birth country. What she does have is relatives trapped in Ukraine. What she does have is zero— not a prayer’s chance in Hell— of helping them or any of her countrymen. What she does have is a smartphone where she can watch the destruction of a peaceful, beautiful country, while helpless to do anything about it.

So she cries.

She cries while missiles fly and bombs fall, while Putin’s 190,000 troops surround, smash, and smother a country that has never done a thing to harm Russia or Putin— except feed them from it’s bountiful farmland— while politicians from the US and Europe furrow their brows at polls and probabilities, and shrink from their human responsibility to stop the Hitler wannabe.

She cries while Putin thumps his chest and threatens Europe just as Hitler did in 1938. She cries while Putin duplicates Hitler’s attack on Czechoslovakia which led to WWII. She cries while Europe and the US apply Chamberlain-like diplomacy.

She cries while the former President of her new country marvels at Putin’s “genius”, while ratings king Tucker Carlson turns up his snotty little nose at Ukraine and Ukrainians.

She cries while you and I worry about the price of gas, how much vegetables will cost, and if Major League Baseball will open its season on-time. She cries while Americans argue over how to cherry-pick history,  as Ukrainian civilians line up for AK-47’s they don’t yet know how to fire, creating history LIVE and on camera. She cries when Ukrainian marine Vitaly Skakun blows up himself and the bridge he’s standing on to block Russian troops at least for awhile.

She cries because she can’t do anything else.

If that disturbs you as much as it does me, here’s an idea: if you know anyone like this young woman or people from any other countries under Putin’s threat, call them and let them know you care, offer help if they lack anything, or just a shoulder if they don’t. 

Find legitimate places to send help to Ukraine and the 50,000 who have already escaped and thousands more who will flow to countries bordering Ukraine.

Help those who eventually make it to the US. 

And tell Carlson, Trump and their soulless buddies what the troops on Ukraine’s Snake Island told the Russian ship that ordered them to surrender or die: “Go F**K Yourself!”

It’s the response our military heroes have given to enemies from the Revolution forward.

It’s the response we should all give.

It’s the response this young woman would give if she had any alternative. But she doesn’t. So after a day of work, of studying, of babysitting, she sits on her couch. 

And cries.

(If you like this, pass it on. If you don't, pass it on anyway. Why should you suffer alone?)

Do you remember what “Bussing” used to be?

My parents trained me to say please and thank you, sir and ma’am, and would you mind passing the salt – Bozo!

OK, I learned the Bozo part from my brothers. 

In elementary school, I learned simple math, simple history and simple English. That’s because my teachers kept telling me how simple their subject and I was – I mean were… Wait a minute…  One “was” becomes a “were” when you add a second “was”, right teacher?

Once I got into high school, I realized how simple teachers were. English was very complicated, not to mention painful, as were history and math. Learning English required reading all kinds of boring books. Math evolved into geometry, trigonometry and algebra! Pure pain.  And history? OMG! It wasn’t just about the US!

College also had enlightening moments. I learned how to drink, get laughed at by pretty girls, and write long papers filled with big words saying nothing. 

The working world taught me that education was less important than kissing a**, and knowing which a** to kiss was critical. It also taught me how much of a waste school was. The only skill required to direct a TV show was timing down to commercial breaks. And TV operates in groups of 60’s, not 10’s. I had to learn a whole new math!

Then came kids: diapers, throwing up, feeding vegetables to the dog under the table and blaming it on siblings or, better yet, cousins when they came to visit. My oldest kid pushed so much spinach down the heater grate, it held up the sale of the house later. 

Grandchildren were so much easier, because I didn’t have to clean up or do anything but watch, laugh, and help them make messes.

You’d think, with all that knowledge, hitting old age would be a snap. Wrong. It’s mind-boggling.

First of all, how old do you have be to be old? My kids thought I was old when they were under 10. That opinion didn’t change in high school, college, entering the workforce, or with the arrival of my grandkids. I may be stepping out on a limb, here, but that disqualifies them in my opinion.

My Match dates don’t care; they’re just glad to see I still have (some of) my hair and can drive a car. 

My doctor’s don’t seem to care, except when they have to accept Medicare. That really ticks them off.

As long as I stay away from mirrors, I’m still virile, handsome, and 25…OK… 40. My wife dumped me because I threw all the mirrors away.

You’re only as old as your jokes, I say.  By the way, what are dad jokes, anyway? And, when you become a grandfather, are you jokes funny again?

As far as I’m concerned, old is anyone older than me, anyone who knows what “bussing” used to be, and anyone who checks obituaries on a daily basis. I only qualify for one of these.

OK… “bussing” is an old person’s term for kissing (I read about it in a history book, I swear)

(If you like this, pass it on. If you don't, pass it on anyway. Why should you suffer alone?)

Screw Covid!

At 7:03 AM on Christmas Day, he loaded the bags of presents into the car, backed out of the driveway, and set off for New York.

The temperature was 30 degrees, a wet cold, which can be worse than 20 degrees of dry cold. He turned up the heat and loaded the address into Google maps.  (I know, he shouldn’t have done it while driving, but 7:03AM was an hour later than he had planned. And besides, who else would be out on Christmas morning?)

“Two of my kids are quarantining in New Jersey and one in New York, while I’m stuck in PA?!”, he had said to himself the night before, “Screw Covid!”

The rising sun was just a faint glow behind the thick fog that blanketed route 95 and drained meadows and towns of color all the way up and across the Verrazano Bridge. During the entire two hour drive, he saw almost no traffic, just a handful of cars actually following the speed limit and two ambulances dashing like greyhounds toward unknown hospitals instead of being stuck in traffic, sirens hopelessly screaming. It brought back memories of when 95 had first opened and felt safe and sleek.

His plan was to drop off the presents without being seen, just as Santa had always done. Now that the kids were grown, though, Santa would have to be more devious than usual. He’d have to sneak the presents onto front stoops or into apartment lobbies, in daylight, and then bolt before anyone noticed. 

The Manhattan skyline, filtered white by the mist, was unexpectedly etherial and silent. He scooted through empty Queens streets, marveling at a New York so peaceful and quiet, and came to a stop at a three story 1900’s high rise, still dignified, still impressive over 100 years later. Leaving the car running, he tip-toed into the empty lobby with two bags filled with multi-colored socks, artists’ pencils, photos of his son at age 3, and he couldn’t remember what else. Then he ran back to the car and gunned it for New Jersey.

Yes! One down, two to go. 

An hour later, he sneaked onto a grey porch, this time on his toes to minimize sound, in a drizzly, still sleeping neighborhood of Summit, New Jersey. Christmas tree lights flickered through closed curtains. The mist was rising a few feet off the empty street, revealing slumbering trees and silent shrubs, all well groomed and motionless. Another bag left, oh so quietly. 

Back to the car, back up the road, this time toward Morristown.

Two down, one to go!

The last house was ten yards from the road, down a steep set of wet, wooden steps  He duplicated the tip toe dash, this time holding onto the railing with one hand, while the other clasped the last Christmas bag – a hushed feat of balance and strength – but nothing compared to his footrace back up the stairs.

All three down! Including grandchildren!  

The drive back was anti-climactic (with the exception of more cars driving, two trucks barreling, and several ambulances dashing). So, while still in New Jersey he called his kids to see if they found the presents (and to gloat with silent pride). 

“Thanks, Dad. Did you get an Uber driver to deliver them?” asked the first one.

“All I can say is Santa did it”, deftly dodging the real question.

“Yes! What a great surprise!” said the second. “Are you here?”

“No.” he said. “You’re there. I’m here”, getting a laugh and again dodging the real question.

Then, the third: “Are you in Pennsylvania?” 

Later he came up with really clever non-answers like: “I’m always in Pennsylvania” , “Isn’t everyone?” and “Where else would I be?”

But he was tired and without wit. Taking over for Santa was a lot more demanding than he had thought. So he panicked.

“Yes, I am.” – A bald-faced lie, something he had raised these very kids to never do.

He felt guilty, but not for long. There are times when one has to lie in order to uphold the larger truth: Santa is real.  

(If you like this, pass it on. If you don't, pass it on anyway. Why should you suffer alone?)